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The Lord of the Rings Lurtz MaskWhom Do You Serve? You can tell a lot about who's on whose side in Middle Earth by the state of their teeth and their preferred diets. For instance, if your dentures are above average and you enjoy eating seed cakes, sausages, jams, cheeses, and good fruit while quaffing good ale amongst the company of friends, you're probably a Hobbit and not exactly a fan of Sauron. However, if your fangs are yellowing and crooked and you like any kind of meat (and

but tensions run high here when that slimeball is mentioned

Or to practice your harp any more

the skulls' eyes shine with an eerie glow

Freddy probably won’t have the urge to tear you to shreds

we suggest you start your training now

Looking fabulous is definitely the kind of winner behavior that earns a Hall of Fame mention

and you're long overdue for some sweet (and much needed) shore leave

After spending years suspended on walls at party supply stores

Become a little bit of everything in one look

You could get ambitious and make a candy bouquet for your dining room centerpiece or a candy garland to hang

You'd better start getting ready

You help the elderly